We'll start with Yoga-
the class didn't destroy me this time! Though I am very very tired and will definitely be sore tomorrow and the next day, I found that I was able to keep up this time around and the instructor, Troy, looked pleased to see me back. The class was huge today with a few "regulars" from the last time I went, including an awesome indian dude with surprisingly sweet body odor that I kind of don't mind smelling as well as an awesome beard, a huge bald guy that looks like he could be in Hell's Angels but also loves to eat organic granola mix before class and share it, as well as the instructor's poodle whose name I don't know- he's chocolate colored and has a mop of hair on his head and the rest of his body is short haired. He has big floppy feet that glop glop across the floor when he comes in to greet everyone. He even sniffed my mat today! I'll take it as a good omen that I'l fall into a strong yoga practice and attend regularly.
and then....
I had three soft tacos at Chipotle. A bit salty, but carnitas is like that. Add a rootbeer and a park and sunshine. The Park at Pike's Place Market was crowded with weirdos and the homeless today. I can't use humor when talking about the poverty in downtown Seattle, but for most, including a friend I met in the park for lunch who lives just above the market, it's a reality that is no longer shocking. A couple sprawled on a makeshift cardboard "bed" spooned and ate popcorn from an enormous orange garbage bag, no doubt from the dumpster behind "Kukuruza" on Pike and 3rd, a gourmet popcorn shop. It's things like this I'm still getting used to living in Seattle, which is without a doubt one of the prettiest cities in the world, but like other cities with their bliss and beauty, there is always the underbelly.
and finally....
this is an actual text conversation I had with a guy I met who asked me out. When I made it clear I wasn't interested (after he said that it was valid if I wasn't interested since I was stalling a bit and trying to turn him down politely), this was his response:
Guy: :(
Guy: *cries*
Me: Hey now. I usually have a hard time turning guys down. It's not easy. I worry about hurt feelings. But your comment (about it being ok to turn him down if I wasn't interested) made me feel like I could be honest.
Guy: But why turn me down? I'm a nice guy
Guy: U don't know anything about me yet and I'm attractive. Makes no sense.
Me: Look I'm not the only girl in Bellevue and this isn't personal
Guy: U should at least meet me for coffee and hear my story.
Me: Hey, you put the ball in my court
Guy: I wanted u to be after me
Guy: Well, your mom thought I was nice. Anyway. Your loss. Not gonna keep bothering you.
Me: OK. Bye.
Guy: Deleting your number. Rejection really hurts.
Me: I know. I've felt it before too...
SERIOUSLY!?!?!?!!!?!!?!??!
For the men of Seattle and the greater Universe: THIS KIND OF BEHAVIOR IS NEVER ATTRACTIVE! Sure, I turn down dates. AND THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH IT AND IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU! I'M NOT INTERESTED, BUT YOU SHOULDN'T FEEL LIKE IT REFLECTS ON YOU SO DEEPLY!
I mean, I met this guy once. ONCE! And I gave him my business card because I started talking about my art (after he asked me what I do)- a professional gesture in my book (especially because it was an an open house in an apartment complex and he was a real estate agent and I could be a potential client). So he shows some interest the next day, and the day after that. And I turn down a date and it's like I told him I thought he was a rotten man and I didn't want to be around him. NO. I just didn't want to go on a date with him. Why? Because when I'm on the date it tells him that he's already sparked my interest. If I'm not sure I want to be on a date, I'm probably not really wanting to be there. Thus, I shouldn't go on dates that I'm not interested in. Did he catch my eye? No, not really. Yeah, he was nice and he was handsome. But I felt no heart pounding pleasure at the sound of his name (or the sound of my phone receiving another text from him). In fact, it became annoying. And quickly.
Men: Don't do this. Don't be "the girl". Don't ask why we aren't attracted to you. Don't tell us you wish we would "be after you" (honestly, who says that!? and in a text message!) and DON'T push. Pushy men don't get dates (unless they're asking someone who is very docile and perhaps even prone to giving into pressure).
You know who you are, you pushy men. Push someone else.
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