It has recently been brought to my attention by a close friend of mine that pooping in public places is somewhat of a strange choice, even detestable. She can't understand why one would choose to defecate in a public restroom, but my thoughts on the matter are quite simple and straight forward. I fully support Public Restroom Pooping. I am not ashamed.
I can understand the discomfort one would feel experiencing the private functions of nature in a place where most activity could potentially be audible. But who hasn't passed wind in a bookstore? Personally I just wander away slowly and quietly, leaving the stink behind to its own destiny. We are no longer a part of each other, the wind and I. This is not to say that I wish to impose my bodily functions on other people. No. I don't believe in making a spectacle of myself or my gastric tendencies. One must be courteous.
The truth of the matter is: if your on a crowded bus (as I often am) or browsing Historical Fiction at Barnes & Noble, you must give yourself grace. And lest "the call" becomes urgent and you are required to use the public (shudder) restroom... well, it's your choice- sweet relief or potential gastric complications from holding yourself back. Don't suffer- it isn't necessary. Chances are NO ONE will even trace the flush to you. I think I have better things to do that peg "the pooper" in the public restroom. Wondering "who done it?" won't make the smell go away, nor will it stop YOU from being "the pooper" next time.
When nature calls, there is no voicemail.
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